Depression and Death

   Lately, there's been a lot of awareness spreading in the world about 'mental illnesses'. Depression is one of them. And, like many people, I too have experienced depression.

   Now, why did I get depressed? Different people get it for different reasons, but I succumbed to depression because of school. I got so stressed out about my studies and couldn't stop comparing myself to my friends and classmates that I was constantly sad. And this has been happening since 9th or 10th grade, but it was at its worst in 11th grade. I'm alright now, I guess. But I have three short poems I wrote last year when I was feeling depressed enough to contemplate death.

 

QUESTION FROM THE DEPRESSED:

Oh Sun, your rays are so warm,

You spread so much light,

You represent happiness,

You facilitate sight.

Then why, I ask you,

Am I in the darkness,

Submerged in cold and cruelty,

Tormented and depressed?

 

DEATH WISH:

Wish I could fall asleep and never wake up again,

Wish I could die and just escape to heaven.

Want to escape this hell,

To run away from this world.

Wish I could close my eyes forever,

Be in peaceful eternal slumber .

Allow darkness to engulf me,

To escape the darkness around me.

DEATH:

God, help me.

I’m going to die tonight.

I can already hear

The angels cry,

Ever so quiet

But ever so loud,

In my ear

When it’s time to depart.

I fear not oblivion,

I fear not the dark.

I fear just the pain

That will inevitably start

When my soul is torn

From this earthy body,

When I depart this world

For another abode.

 

To all of you out there who can totally relate, we've all got our battles. Just remember: you'll survive. You deserve better.

Also, don't even think of suicide. Dying is excruciatingly painful, I'm sure. And while it may last only a few moments for you, ..... you'll leave a permanent ache in the hearts of your loved ones. Don't do that.

Everyday is a new day. So start it off with a smile! And then, keep on smiling!